Author: admin_bmedia@able2

By Rick Burns (as published in the July 2023 ABLE2 Monthly Moments Newsletter)

“They are the Christmas party super dancers!” I enthusiastically pronounced to my wife as we rolled out of the parking lot on an overcast but otherwise pleasant June afternoon.  

I had just finished having a hot beverage with Viji and Rachel, two friends that first met through ABLE2’s matching program. 

I was the first to arrive for our coffee-chat at the Starbucks in College Square, bristling full of young students and afternoon shoppers. The purpose of this informal interview was to profile a successful, long-term match to include in an article in ABLE2’s monthly newsletter.  

As I waited a few moments for Viji and Rachel to arrive, I suddenly wondered how I would know who they were? I instantly recognized them however as they walked through the door – I remembered seeing them at previous events, notably ABLE2’s annual Christmas party. 

How could I forget? Each year, Viji and Rachel tend to be one of the first ones on the dance floor, and to say they move with joy and enthusiasm would be great understatement. I clearly remember my wife (unsuccessfully) trying to get me to bust a move at ABLE’s marquis annual event, nodding towards Viji and Rachel: “But look how much fun they are having!”

It was a great start to the interview because I felt like I already kind of knew them.  

My initial impression as we greeted each other was how natural and comfortable they seemed with each other. They gave off the vibe of two old friends meeting for a coffee to chat and catch-up – a casual, nothing-to-see here type of Saturday afternoon hang out. And my initial instincts proved to be correct. In fact, when asked, like a lot of old friends, they could not quite remember how long exactly it had been since they first met.

“17, 18 years….2004 maybe” Viji responded to my first inquiry about the length of their friendship. 

As I came to uncover, their relationship has grown substantially over the almost two decades since they first met. Going to coffee shops, seeing movies, hanging out, chatting over Facebook……they do all of the things you would think of that are typical of strong, mutually beneficial relationship.

They went on to describe what they meant to each other and that, like any other solid friendship, they can tell each other anything and play a big part in each other’s lives. 

“What is your most memorable moment together?” I asked as I perused a list of pre-selected interview questions I had on hand. There was a bit of pause, no one single moment immediately jumped to either of them. 

Rachel then just got to crux of it all with one answer: “Viji is really easy to talk to, we just have fun together, it is great to have a friend that understands you.” 

I asked Viji: “Could you point to one thing you have learned from Rachel?”

“She forces me out of my comfort zone somethings……..like dancing!!” Viji responded with a smile. 

As we spoke, I found out that not only is Rachel one ABLE2’s best Christmas partiers, she has previously taken Jazz dancing lessons and used to be a regular at the Dovercourt dances. She reiterated, while Viji nodded her head, that dancing was a great to release energy and just have fun. 

It was at this point where this interviewer may have made a big mistake. Perhaps out of nervous politeness, I ever so casually mentioned that maybe I would hit the floor at the next Christmas party. Upon telling my wife about this off-hand commitment I made, she smiled and said she could not wait. My goodness what have I done, I (half?) jokingly thought to myself. 

As we finished up our conversation, I posed my last and ultimate question: “What would you say to someone who is interested in becoming involved in ABLE2’s matching program? The response came quick: “Just do it! You can expand your social network, do interesting things and it is a great way to make a new friend!” 

In fact, as we spoke, it was pointed out that there would be no impact on their friendship at all if ABLE2 stopped existing tomorrow, which is the ultimate nod to the effectiveness of the matching program. While ABLE2 brought them together, it is their commonalities and genuine connection that has nurtured their relationship over the years. 

Rachel and Viji’s friendship is something not everyone in the world is lucky to have. In a modern life, tied to our screens, always playing catch up – we could all benefit from having a connection like theirs. And that, dear reader, brings us to the heart of it all: who among us could not use another good friend? 

I look forward to seeing Viji and Rachel at the next ABLE2 event. And I am left wondering if they will hold me to my mention of dancing at the next Christmas party? We shall see…

By Rick Burns

Written by Julie Cashman

(as published in the July 2023 ABLE2 Monthly Moments Newsletter)

Hello,

My topic for today is social housing from my point of view so people can see the good points and all it has to offer for people like me on ODSP

I am 42 and I waited patiently on the social housing registry for 11 years to get a 1-bedroom apartment.

Every Christmas was my due date to call into the Social Registry and update my file once a year. My mom and I picked Christmas/December because it was an easy time to remember for both of us. I would also ask the Social Registry to send me a list so I could choose more options of housing in Ottawa each year.

After 11 years of waiting and choosing, they finally called me in 2021. I still remember the lady in the office of Social Registry when I first applied who gave me a hint, a huge one, don’t limit yourself to one area of the city, choose more options from the list. 

And so, I did, and that’s what got me in faster to social housing. 

So, I moved into social housing, and got the keys, and signed the lease, and made lots of friends. I now volunteer in our programs for Veggie Friday that happens every Friday, and Breakfast Tuesday and I benefit from these two programs, and also the foot lady from southeast Ottawa comes to take care of my feet every six weeks.

My rent is a lot cheaper, under $200 for a 1 bedroom providing my income does not change for ODSP.

We have to submit our notice of assessment along with our ODSP papers, and a pink slip we get from Ottawa housing to tell Ottawa housing we are doing our income taxes each year. It lets them know we are still at the same income level to keep our houses. If we do not comply with this or fail to send that information we lose our housing and our apartment goes back up to market rent and they kick us out.

Since moving here, I have made more friends. I love volunteering. I am thriving and saving more money. And that is the benefits of social housing. I do not have to worry anymore about paying market rent, or worrying about rising food cost, or having to put clothes on my back, because I can afford all theses things.

Thank you very much for listening to me today and I hope it gives you all a great knowledge of social housing and provides you with better feedback and gives you some more idea that social housing is better life.

Merci and thank you.

Julie Cashman

Chair, Consumer Advisory Committee

By Julie Cashman 

May 2023

Hello, I’d like to introduce myself, I am Julie Cashman and I am co-chair of Consumer Action Committee with ABLE2. This is my story about me and my mom Joanne Cashman who died of ovarian cancer in October 2019. 

I first got epilepsy when I was six years old, and my mom was my biggest supporter in life. She’d stay by my side taking me to doctors appointments and rushing me to the ER when I had seizures and even keeping a journal of my seizures and meds.

Over the many years growing up she became my biggest supporter for a disabled person who had epilepsy. She got me involved in ABLE2 formerly Citizen Advocacy because my mother saw how I was struggling in life with my disability to make friends. It’s only because of ABLE2 and the help of my mother I went onto have 2 matches plus my current match.

Without the support of my mom, I would not have known about ABLE2 or other resources such as Build Community or Reach lawyers for people with disabilities, that CRA does incomes for free as long as you are on ODSP, subsidy housing or even having an RDSP account as a disability person for my retirement. I now in turn have become co-chair of the Consumer Action Committee and a board member on the ABLE2 Board of Directors. I also volunteer in my apartment building on Fridays for the veggie Friday program supporting tenants where I live. My goal in life is to be happy and I love volunteering.

Without the support of my mom, I would not have known about ABLE2 or other resources such as Lifetime Networks or Reach lawyers for people with disabilities, that CRA does incomes for free as long as you are on ODSP, subsidy housing or even having an RDSP account as a disability person for my retirement. I now in turn have become co-chair of the Consumer Action Committee and a board member on the ABLE2 Board of Directors. I also volunteer in my apartment building on Fridays for the veggie Friday program supporting tenants where I live. My goal in life is to be happy and I love volunteering.

By Julie Cashman, Co-chair of Consumer Action Committee

By Rick Burns, ABLE2 Match Ally and Board Member (as published in the May 2023 ABLE2 Monthly Moments Newsletter)

I have a confession to make. People sometimes think I am such a good person for taking part in ABLE2’s Matching program, and that through my “volunteering”, I am making a real difference in my community. I need to get this off my chest though:  I have not considered myself a volunteer for a long time. 

Let me take a step back and explain the situation. 

I don’t remember the exact date, but it was a clear fall day circa 2011. I was surprised to feel a tad nervous as I approached his building, not surprising considering the novelty of the situation.  Really, how many times has anyone been formally matched with another adult for the sole purpose of friendship? 

My first impression – he was a hulk of a man.  As I walked closer to him, alongside the social worker, feigning a slight wave of anxiety, my internal monologue continued to pose the question: “What on earth am I getting myself into?”. 

Before I knew it, with smiles and outstretched hands, I heard ““Hi, I am Andy” and the rest, as they say, is history. 

Meeting Andy that day was the culmination of some inner soul searching.  I had been looking for some time for a meaningful and personal way I could contribute and give back to the community. Volunteering was always something I knew I wanted to do, but the idea of doing more work after coming home from the office was not overly appealing.  It was through this minimalist lens that I began slowly, hesitantly looking into volunteer opportunities around my neighbourhood. Not going to lie, I was skeptical that I could find something meaningful AND easy.  As selfish as it may sound, while my overall focus was on “giving back”, I could not silence the little voice in my head” “what would I get out this”. 

I wanted to volunteer, but kind of in a lazy way, if such a concept can exist, so when I stumbled upon ABLE2’s matching program, I was intrigued. What would be the harm in filling out this little application to start? 

Fast forward a few months, I was somewhat uneasy as I sat down for the first time with the social worker to discuss potential matches. I nervously thought: how do I express to them in a sensitive way that I am not equipped to be a caretaker and that all I have to offer is my (well-honed) ability to simply hang out? So, without shame, I provided an overview of my “social” resume:  I like to chat, sit, watch sports, drink the odd beer, go to the gym, watch movies…….I was putting all of my cards on the table and was considering strongly the chance I would be rejected on the spot. 

Either by happenstance, luck – or more likely due to the incredible matchmaking services at ABLE2 – they found me what turned into a perfect match. 

“Do you like movies? Would you come to my next movie night?  Would you ever go to the pub with me?” I don’t know if these were the exact three questions Andy asked me the evening we first met, but it was definitely within the first few minutes.  My nerves now aside – without thinking – I blurted an enthusiastic: “Of course, sounds fun!”.  

I had no idea then that from that day on I would be seeing Andy for next twelve years and counting. I hang out with him now every week, usually on Thursdays. I go to his place or mine or we go to the Pub to watch the game – we eat chips, pizza, wings (and beer for me!), chat and just chill out, which is pretty much my MO whenever I see any of my other family or friends. I should also mention that Andy is a great cook, and he has made amazing meals for us on many occasions. I have also learned that one of the greatest feelings in the world is spending time with someone who is genuinely happy to see you each and every time. 

I remember the first time the social worker followed up with us about our match sometime after our first meeting. In a nutshell (while being polite of course), I said something to the effect: “I do not think we will really need your services”. 

And this brings me to the crux of this story, I have not considered hanging out with Andy as volunteering for quite some time. Andy is my good friend, he is now like family. 

In the end, I would recommend an ABLE2 Matching program to anyone.  It is a chance to make a real meaningful difference in someone’s life, including your own. And – who among us could not use another friend? What other life experience can be so rewarding with the only effort being “show up” and “enjoy”? 

Anyways, that is my confession. I feel much better and thank you for reading. 

-Rick 

(as published in the March 2023 ABLE2 Monthly Moments Newsletter)

In honour of Women’s History Month, we would like to recognize one of our many amazing volunteers. Anna Bilsky has been a volunteer with ABLE2 almost from the beginning. Wanting to set an example of volunteerism for her young children, she felt the Matching Program would be a good fit for her. For the past 40 years Anna has balanced volunteering with raising a family and a very accomplished career.

Her first match Michael was very shy and reserved when she met him. Michael had never had a person in his life who was not a family member or a paid support worker. Together they began a 12-year journey of friendship and learning. Michael’s world opened up and his life was soon full of activities and friendships. “I would like to believe that I played a role in that,” says Anna. “Michael was so busy it was hard to get time with him.” The match had accomplished what was intended and they ended the match after 12 years but not the friendship. Michael passed away but Anna will never forget what a wonderful and kind man he was.

Anna was next matched with Ruth. Ruth loved to shop! They spent a great deal of time at Carlingwood Mall, especially Coles. When it came time for Ruth to move into a home Anna was right there helping Ruth’s sister to find the right place for her until her death. Ruth lovingly referred to her as the “third sister”.

Anna’s third match was Marjorie whose passing was featured in our last newsletter. After Marjorie’s husband George passed away, she felt utterly alone in the world. Her grief was compounded by various health issues. Anna helped bring her out into the world with weekly coffee meetings and scratch cards (they called their moment of hope). Anna provided Marjorie with support and was often the voice of reason in her life. 

Anna has also been matched with a second person, Veronica. She has never really felt like Veronica is a “match” as they have had a close friendship for 30 years after meeting while serving on ABLE2’s Board of Directors. “Anna has been a big part of my life and has accompanied me on medical appointments and to family weddings. She has really helped me,” says Veronica.

Anna’s time and friendship for people in her life has been profound. Anna is a true leader. ABLE2 celebrates all she has done for her community.

THANK YOU, ANNA!

#FaceOfABLE2